I have always been struck by the contrast between Mother’s Day and Father’s Day celebrations. Generally, Mother’s Day is a great holiday and a reason for widespread joy in which most recognize mothers’ hard work and selflessness. Celebrating mom is a social obligation enthusiastically embraced because everyone has every reason to do so. Recognizing fathers, however, does not carry the same social weight, and the effusiveness diminishes considerably. Both parents are important, but the emphasis and recognition seem different.
I can understand that several factors contribute to this situation, but I am struck by the difference in the way many churches celebrate both dates. I have noticed that during the service on Mother’s Day, apart from recognizing and congratulating mothers, the message focuses on encouraging and thanking them for their essential work. This all seems appropriate to me, but I notice the contrast when the situation is different during the service on Father’s Day. Aside from the fact that the recognition tends to be less, the message generally focuses on encouraging fathers to improve their behavior and become more involved with their families. In other words, the tendency is to congratulate mothers and rebuke fathers.
It is true that many Christian fathers need to take more spiritual leadership of their families, but it’s equally important to recognize the good they are doing. Men need to hear what good they are and are doing and not just what they need to improve. Positive recognition and encouragement can empower and motivate them to continue their important work in the family and community.
As men, many of us grow up hearing that our value is in what we do and the accomplishments we achieve. However, the reality is that our true importance comes from who we are and not from what we do. Being comes before doing. For this reason, I am concerned when the emphasis shifts away from this fundamental truth as followers of Jesus. We need to hear and be reminded that our heavenly Father loves us unconditionally and that we are valuable and important.
Human beings, male and female, are valuable because we were created in the image and likeness of God (Gen. 1:27). God loves us unconditionally (1 John 4:7-14). Our love for the Lord can only be given because He first loved us. This love does not depend on our actions but on divine grace. Therefore, what we do or do not do does not change God’s love for us.
Furthermore, by receiving salvation in Jesus, we become children of God (1 John 3:1-3). As children, our relationship with the Father is already close and established forever. Our value and acceptance are total and permanent. Many of us are accustomed to giving love, but we forget that we can provide it because we have already received it from our heavenly Father. What we do flows from who we are and not vice versa.
In a world driven by competition and values achievement more than character, we must remember that our value is not found in what we do. We are created in God’s image; we are his children, and God loves us unconditionally. Christian men and fathers need encouragement as well as exhortation to improve. Who can you encourage this week?
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